Faster Than the Speed of Sanic
by Doe Eyes at Dusk
Summary: This is what happens when I get very little sleep. In other words, how my cracked brain goes from Austria's Piano to America's Mental Breakdown. Utter Crack Fic. Enjoy


**Disclaimer: I don't own Sanic; I don't own Hetalia. All I own is my own insanity.**

 **Enjoy ~Doe Eyes At Dusk**

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Austria (to Prussia): I will now express my anger towards you through a song.

Prussia: Piano is never a good way to show emotions! Kesesesese!

Austria: *throws piano at Prussia* Who says piano isn't a sufficient way to express my anger?

*Prussia is knocked unconscious by flying piano*

Austria: *facepalms* I'm surrounded by idiots.

Norway: *happens to be walking by and hears him* Yes! I'm not the only one!

Denmark: *was walking with Norway* Are you suggesting that I'm an idiot?

Iceland: *was also walking with Norway* Probably.

Denmark: No fair, Icy! Sve's a bigger idiot than I am! *goes to Sweden's house and destroys all the IKEA products*

*Iceland runs away to find Sweden*

Iceland (to Sweden): Sweden, Denmark's destroying your stuff.

Sweden: I'm gonna punch him in the face.

Iceland: Why?

Sweden: Because he's Denmark; do I need any other reason?

*Sweden disappears to punch Denmark*

Iceland: This should be interesting. *follows Sweden*

Finland: *secretly follows Iceland*

Sweden: *finds Denmark and punches him in the face before stuffing him in a box*

Finland: *aims rifle at Iceland* Get away from my husband!

(Me: Hm, overreacting much?)

Iceland: I-I'm going to hide in an IKEA store… *runs away from angry Finn*

*Finland follows Iceland*

Sweden (to Iceland and Finland): Don't get lost!

Norway (appearing randomly to look for Iceland): Don't get lost where?

Sweden: Iceland and Finland went to IKEA.

Norway: What?! Not my little brother! I have to find him before he's lost forever! *disappears to look for Iceland*

Sweden (to Norway): Don't get lost!

Denmark (from inside box): Uh, Sve? Can you let me out?

Sweden: *glares at box ineffectively, kicks it and walks away*

Denmark: Uh, Sve? You still there?

*many hours later*

America (not watching where he's going): *trips over Denmark's box*

Denmark (still inside box and starting to get claustrophobic): Hello? I'd appreciate being let out of here!

America: *opens box curiously*

Denmark: *glomps America* Thank-you-thank-you-thank-you-thank-you-thank-you! You saved my life; I am eternally grateful!

(Me: Did anyone get that? Huh? Huh? … Oh well… Disney movies 4 life...)

Denmark: Now to go to IKEA and save my friends from that wretched maze! *runs to IKEA* Gotta go fast! Faster than the speed of Sanic! *disappears in a blur of speed*

America: Sanic?

*America goes home and googles Sanic*

America: *sees the weird awesomeness of Sanic and freaks out, calling Estonia* Get over here! Something's wrong with my computer!

Estonia: *jumps through the window with epic background music playing* Oh, that's just Sanic.

America: What the flip is Sanic!? *calls Lithuania* Lithu-, Lithi-, Litho-, Lithuwa-! Oh, never mind! Estonia's not making any sense; what's a Sanic?

Lithuania (on phone): Um? My name's Lithuania… I didn't think it was that hard to pronounce… Sanic is a spiky blue hedgehog type thing. Pretty much making fun of Sonic… Maybe Poland would find it easier to explain? *gives the phone to Poland*

Canada (walking in unexpectedly): America, why're you looking at Sanic? *sees Estonia* U-um, now may not be the best time but where do you keep the maple syrup? I need it, fast.

America: Down the hall to the left… Did you just say 'fast'?

Canada: *nods* Yeah, thanks.

Matt: *drops off the ceiling* Let's get that syrup and head back to Vancouver! Faster than the speed of Sanic!

Kumajiro (to Canada): Who are you?

Canada (to Kumajiro): I'm Canada.

Poland (on the phone): So you, like, totally need to know about Sanic?

America: Nevermind… *hangs up the phone*

Estonia: I'll just be going back to Mr. Russia's place then… Faster than the speed of Sanic…

*Estonia jumps out the window and runs off, leaving America to his mental breakdown*

*America slamming his head in the wall and screaming at the top of his lungs*

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 **A/N: I'm so proud of this… *tear* So proud… See kids? This is why you need a full night's sleep. If you don't get your rest you slowly go insane in the form of writing total crack fics. I need help desperately, but let's put that off for now shall we? Should we see how many more of these senseless things I make? I place my bet at 14.**

 **~ Doe Eyes At Dusk**


End file.
